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DiscGolf-A-Thon

Reprinted with permission of the Author, Conrad Damon www.stanford.edu/~damon/

At ten till five in the morning, Berkeley is navy blue. Enough bits of ambient light gather on the occasional leaf to make it shine, but other than that it's largely dark. And quiet, quiet enough that you can hear your second drive of the day splash gently into the lake.

Leonard really likes planning, especially if it involves maps. He's been wanting to do this for about two years, ever since Harold Hampton and three friends managed to play ten courses in a day. Leonard's a former holder of the "how much distance can two people get a disc to cover in 24 hours" record (see WFDF rulebook, or Guinness), and I'm a current one, so it was unlikely that our arms would fall off. That's a start, we thought.

On the road between Sonoma and Ukiah I was feeling pretty good. It was beautiful out, sunny and green and clear. We had played two courses and done a fair amount of driving. Good tunes - PJ Harvey, Pumpkins, or Neil Young probably. My day was already several hours long, and I thought "Lunch sounds really good about now." I looked at the clock... 6:54. That was a truly odd moment.

The scenery for the first half of the day was wonderful - rolling hills of dried grass and scrub oaks, low mountains, a river - though it tended to go by kind of fast. A note for anyone who's driven from the Ukiah course to the Lakeport course: yes, we did it in 43 minutes, taking highway 175, Leonard driving, me just hanging on.

By the time we dropped down into Sacramento (Orangevale, actually) it was hot. A general feeling of being worn-down began to set in, and things began to hurt. In the car, they stiffen. It's hard to eat, and your mind gets hazy. Your tenses shift. Of course, I played better with all that, but that's me. Del Campo is probably where we felt the worst. Though it's only nine holes, they're spread out and mostly in the sun. I began hallucinating that I was throwing colorful plastic discs at metal baskets, how absurd. On the maddeningly long run from the last hole back to the car we both got leg cramps. Then we headed down the Central Valley to play three more courses.

At nine-twenty in the evening, Moraga is navy blue. The moon is up, and there's just enough light to see the deer grazing across the road. It's quiet. And peaceful.

-------------------------------------------

If this is a record, then what are the rules? is among the questions raised. Well, "rules" is a stretch. Guidelines is a better bet. Play during the day, while there's at least a bit of light. Hints for maximizing daylight: Summer solstice is good. Winter solstice is not. Be northerly. Move from east to west. Get up early. Another guideline is to try to play 18-hole basket courses, since that's the reference point for what a disc golf course is. PDGA rules - mark your lie. Different records for different numbers of people playing - who knows? On second thought, forget guidelines and rules, just go do it. Try to impress us. We know what to look for.

More hints: Drive like maniacs. Well, safety-conscious maniacs. Tickets will only slow you down, as will driving off cliffs. Hurry. Run through your rounds like maniacs. Play for time more than score. Safe pars can be your friends - you don't want to be looking for discs, or spend ten minutes getting your favorite yellow Roc out of a tree and then kill yourself catching up to a short feisty ponytailed guy named Leonard just because you like challenges. Try to avoid that if possible. Hurry. Have a plan. Pack your food and drinks. Take lots of drinks. Call them beverages if you like. Don't talk to strangers. Hurry. Not everything makes sense. Hurry. What are you doing reading this, you're losing time. Hurry. Know the courses.

Study questions:

What other areas would be good for maximum courses in a day?

How far under par can you get in one day without playing the same hole twice?

How much fun can you have in one day without having the same fun twice?

Why have a universe and all this stuff, instead of just nothing at all?

Do you think this is a good life?

Show your work.

Fun facts:

Courses: 15

18 holes: 10

9 holes: 5

Object: 1

Private: 1

Holes: 225

Miles driven: 526

Car: 95 Integra

Top speed: 100

Tickets: none

Close calls that perhaps involved evasion: 1

Drinks consumed: 33 (12-ounce) - ran out at Stockton

Cramps: Calf, groin, hamstring, stomach

Weight loss (Leonard): 6 pounds

Final score (Leonard): -19

Final score (Conrad): -60

Lost discs: 2 each

Aces: none

Metal, basket and above: 2 (Conrad)

The stats: